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One Side: Beth

Sometimes I'm recorded while having a meal. It's jarring to spot myself on her social media – it’s like a sudden shock.

A close companion of a decade, Marielle, calls herself the “creativity monarch”. It’s fun for a short while, but it weighs on our friendship.

Being highly outgoing, there's a constant urge the need to record everything constantly. During meals out, her motto is, “The phone eats first,” and snaps pictures with bright lighting, which induces embarrassment. It's unpleasant when other people see her performing for the camera – I get secondhand embarrassment. Another annoyance is because meals lose their warmth.

She isn’t exactly an online personality yet, but Marielle is trying to be. She creates vlogs about city life, a day in her life, and her styling career. Her content is good, I’ll give her that, but I don’t want to be involved. On occasion I'm captured while dining, or simply tagging along. I’ll see myself on her Instagram later, and it comes like a jumpscare: I might be bare-faced, an awkward face or be captured mid-bite. It feels invasive.

She also anticipates that I will to film her at inconvenient times. Sometimes I’ll be talking to another person, or we're simply spending time in the street. The dynamic feels like our bond has turned into me serving as her free crew. She could easily employ someone if she wanted high-quality content. When I brought up my discomfort about the situation, she brushed it off. I've been invited to a couple of brand events, which was nice, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I spend helping her make content.

I’m grateful that she has supported me with my career in design, but I resist our connection to become just a ledger of favours. I don’t feel she’s fake or dishonest, but sometimes it seems that if recording starts, we will begin acting in a way that presents a favorable image for her channel.

Her directive is, “OK, look happy!” and film me smiling with another. It feels forced. It's crucial her to recognize that our decade-long friendship still has boundaries. I love being with her, but I also want to experience it without being recorded, altered, or shared for an viewers. I am not a accessory for her online persona.

The Defence: Marielle

I hope my friend to see that the creations we make together can get us an opportunity.

I am passionate about shooting content. It’s not just a hobby; it’s part of who I am. Creating videos and sharing my life online allows me to show my personality and connect with people in novel forms.

I wouldn't label myself as a full influencer yet, but it's savvy to make money from your passions. I look up to people on TikTok who pull off that aesthetic of informal, self-made content creation.

Content creation is my interpretation of engaging with life: noticing the details, posting them with an viewership that values the art behind it. It's never my aim to make my friend uncomfortable. Bringing her to industry events was my way of sharing opportunities, providing her a opportunity to witness behind-the-scenes moments that could benefit her professional path too. That isn't blackmail, it's simply being pragmatic.

I’d still take her to these events even if she didn’t help me, but I desire her to see what the work we make together can get us: a foot in the door. I understand not all people enjoys being filmed, but often spontaneity is what makes material genuine. Being recorded occasionally is part and parcel of being my friend. I'd remove anything she asked, but she has never asked yet.

I don’t expect anyone to be my personal filmmaker, but friends help each other in minor capacities. I thought filming a short video here or there would be enjoyable for her. Creativity thrives in collaboration, and having my friend around makes projects lively and enjoyable. I never force her to participate in anything, and I’d never deliberately humiliate her. But creating content jointly sometimes is part of how I record our time together.

I value our friendship profoundly and want to avoid content creation to drive a wedge between us. I’m willing to compromise: like asking before recording, and avoiding angles that might make her uncomfortable.

This isn’t about control, it’s about expressing my perspective while still considering hers. Clearly content creation is not a substitute for real connection: it's merely part of how I live my life and I want her to be involved in a way that’s agreeable for each of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and Beth when they are out together?

Nothing is more excruciating than having a friend point a camera at you. I understand that it’s Marielle’s passion, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my workplace. Perhaps she can find like-minded creators to collaborate with. With the uncertain future of AI, personal relationships are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
A respondent, 25

If you’re doing something professionally, it's unfair to expect your friends for assistance repeatedly, even if they have helped previously. While she enjoys creating, that doesn’t mean all those around her is willing material. She must to honor Beth’s personal space.
Ankit, 26

Marielle might love making content and showing off her life publicly, but it isn't for everybody. It’s nice she has assisted Beth’s career, but she needs to listen to what Beth wants.
A commenter, 27

It sounds like you value each other, so hold on to that and make sure it’s the focus in your friendship. Foster some real memories, where genuine feelings are stored, not digital scrapbooks. In fact, celebrities who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
Sarah, 53

She seems to be neither present nor genuine when they're together – she's on the job. Both seem confused as to where the line is. The answer is not found in trying to change one another, but in each establishing clear limits around what is comfortable to them and determining if there is an mutually agreeable compromise.
Barbara, 71

Now You Be the Judge

In an online poll: has she been over-exposing their bond?